Thursday, February 02, 2012

Simplifying My Taxes, A Letter to the IRS.

While I'm simplifying my life one segment at a time, I decided I would take on the greatest challenge of all, simplifying my taxes. Turns out there are laws about this... Which led me to writing this letter to the IRS.

Dear IRS,

I'm writing you to discuss the simplification of my personal taxes. See, I want to pay my taxes. I'm thrilled to give you my money in exchange for the right to work, live, and own property in the United States. I couldn't be happier about the arrangement we have going here. My challenge is this, I just can't figure out how much money to give you.

I know how much money I made last year exactly, and I know exactly how much was withheld from my paycheck and given to you. I just can't seem to figure out what that is worth to you. It appears that I will need to fill out the following forms to figure this out.
  • 1040
  • 740mp
  • Colorado Partial Year
  • 740 full year
  • Schedule A
  • 3903
  • Schedule E
  • 4562
  • Schedule M
  • Schedule D

Is this really necessary? I'm an honest guy, and have no desire to cheat you out of any money. How much do you need? Do you need to have about 10% of what I made? 15%? 20%?

If you really want me to fill out all of these forms I will, but hey it's me, Phil. We've done business together for years. You know me, I know you. Just tell me how much I owe you, and I'll give it to you.

It doesn't have to be a flat tax, but couldn't it at least be simple?

Your Favorite Tax Payer,

Phil